Speaker 0
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Speaker 1
Into the wild, I'm going. Into the wild, I am. It's been a wild freedom challenge since I left my roots back home. Into the wild I'm good. Into the wild I hid. It's been a wild freedom child since I left my roots back home.
Speaker 2
Welcome to the Free Birth Society podcast. This is a radical space for women who are ready to celebrate their autonomous choices in birth, motherhood, and beyond. Together, we'll learn about wild birth through personal narrative, we'll explore the politics of birth, and we'll analyze everything that relates to our lives as women from a feminist perspective. Here's your host, Emilee Saldaya. It's been
Speaker 1
a wild freedom change since I left my roots back home.
Speaker 0
Women, it is twenty twenty five, which means it is time for you to take your place in the sovereign birth movement. I am thrilled to announce that our absolutely groundbreaking, life changing, consciousness shifting, super popular program, the Radical Birthkeeper School is now open for enrollment. This is your chance. We run the Radical Birthkeeper School once a year, so now is the time to jump in. You love this podcast. You're obsessed with birth. You want a better world for women and families. So here it is. I am inviting you to join the eight hundred and fifty women from over thirty countries who have taken this program and now are confidently bringing this work forward, protecting the sacredness of birth, being an option so desperately needed for mothers and babies. From women brand new to birth to curious mothers pregnant with their first child to disillusioned midwives and doulas, even OBGYNs and nurses, women are flocking to this new paradigm of birth consciousness and the Radical Birthkeeper School is the gateway. The RBK School is the place to gain the language and the knowledge to communicate and step into the sovereign birth paradigm with confidence. If you feel the call, answer it by taking your place in the RBK School. Head over to w w w dot radical birthkeeper school dot com today to preview the full curriculum, hear from our many graduates, and learn more. Mentorship, sisterhood, lifetime access, the knowledge, wisdom, and guidance you need to take your place in the sovereign birth revolution all totally unlocked. Be the change, join us, radicalbirthkeeperschool dot com. Every now and then a product comes along that our entire family can't get enough of, and lately it's masa chips. Delicious chips made the way food was meant to be. Just three simple ingredients, organic corn, salt, and beef tallow. No seed oils, no fillers, no ultra processed garbage, just real whole food that nourishes rather than depletes. What we put into our bodies matters. It affects our energy, our mood, our resilience, and yet the food industry today is completely disconnected from what's real and nourishing. Just like birth, food is one of the most powerful ways to claim sovereignty over our bodies. And, it's no surprise that a sovereign birthing family is who makes these chips. When you snack, snack on something real. Go to masa chips dot com slash discount slash free birth society and use code free birth society for twenty percent off your first order.
Speaker 3
Alright. Welcome, Mia.
Speaker 4
Thanks for having me.
Speaker 3
Calling in from New Jersey. How long have you been out there? Are you born and raised?
Speaker 4
No. My husband was born and raised here, but I've been here for two years now.
Speaker 3
And where are you from before that?
Speaker 4
North Carolina, Wilmington, right by the beach.
Speaker 3
Yep. Oh, okay. I still haven't gone out that way. You know I'm in North Carolina?
Speaker 4
Mhmm.
Speaker 3
Yeah. Cool.
Speaker 4
Yeah. It's the best.
Speaker 3
Alright. Let's get into it. So who are you before you have this baby? What's your relationship like to birth and to the medical system? And, you know, at what point in in your journey since it is your first birth story do you start to figure out this thing?
Speaker 4
So I fell sick with horrible gut issues when I was a teenager, and so I went to gastroenterologist. They prescribed me all these pills. And after a while, I just kind of caught on. I was like, none of this is working. Like, why why do you keep prescribing new pills? I saw the sheet that they gave me every single time, and it was the same recommendations, like, don't eat bananas and avoid spicy food and all of this. So at a very early age, I lost trust in the medical system. And so I just I stopped going. I was going to college, so I wasn't gonna be in North Carolina anymore.
Speaker 3
I
Speaker 4
went to University of Miami, but right before that, I got connected with a, like, homeopathic nutritionist type person. And she absolutely changed my life. I was able to just text her anytime I had a symptom. She actually helped me heal. We had a very personal relationship, and I was like, wow. This is what real healing is about. This is the type of relationship you should have with, you know, someone who's trying to help you. And so that kind of, you know, that was my early phase. And then in high school, people knew I was, like, always natural minded. I think I attribute this to my mom because she was, like, super duper hippie, tie dye back in the eighties and nineties, all of that. So, I think that was just instilled in me to always lean toward more natural things. Like, you know? So then, yeah, people were like, you should watch this documentary business of birth. Mia, you would really like it. And so I watched that, and then I was like, woah. Birth is insanely ridiculous. Like, I couldn't believe it. Fast forward many, many years, not many years, like, four years. And I met a girl who was also a fellow raw milk drinker. So I was like, this girl's gotta be cool. And we were touring a farm. It was like a mushroom like a mushroom like a indoor mushroom farm. And we were just talking about birth, and we're like, yeah. Birth is crazy. I'm like, yeah. I'm totally gonna do a home birth one day. And she was like, have you heard of Freebird Society? And I was like, no. What is that? So then I go down the route at home. So I'm, like, listening to all these stories. I'm totally into it. And a few months later, she comes to visit me up here, and we met up in the city. And I just look at her, and some energy, like, hit me. And I was like, holy cow. She's pregnant. Like, I just knew out of nowhere. And we weren't even that close, but and it's funny because our boy like, our both of our boyfriends at the time met online, and that's how we ended up meeting. But and she's from Wilmington, my hometown. Like, it was just wild. So I was like, can I please be at your birth? Like, I will come to your birth. If you want someone there, like and I've known this girl for a few months. Okay. And she's like, yeah. Come to my birth. Oh my god. And yeah. It was wild. And, you know, at the dinner, she's like, I'm still thinking. I don't know if she's pregnant during the dinner. And then she was like, to my husband, you can have my tuna. Like, I'm trying to avoid mercury, and I was like, she is pregnant. So, yeah, that was fun. So we we just chatted throughout her pregnancy. I don't even think I visited her really except for that one time. And at the time, I think she was, like, eighteen weeks pregnant or something. So I was just like, alright. So I booked a flight. I made it flexible booking. I didn't have a job, so I was flexible with my time. And I was like, k. We'll see if I'm there for the birth or not. Like, you know, we'd had all these discussions, and I ended up being there for the birth. And it was wild. Like, I it was a psychedelic experience for me. I had to, like, go sit on the beach after and just, like, stare at the ocean. I was like, what the heck just happened?
Speaker 3
Did she have a sovereign birth?
Speaker 4
Yeah. She had pre I mean, I was the only person there. So she had a pre birth, and her partner was there. So, yeah, we had this, like, crazy experience together. I stayed with her, like, a week after too, so I was able to see early postpartum, which was really special. I feel like a lot of people don't realize what happens in those first days, and that was, like, completely mind boggling to me too. And just I realized how important it was to have someone there to like, I was, like, feeding her, making her ice cream, helping her with laundry, and, you know, just letting her be with her baby and got to see, like, when her milk came in and all of that. And so, yeah, it was quite special. But, yeah, she had a free birth. She had a pretty
Speaker 3
The story is so the story is so cute.
Speaker 4
Yeah. It was like
Speaker 3
If your husband your boyfriends, whatever, met online, and then you met her and you liked raw milk, and then she told you about FBS. And then Yeah. You went to her free birth. Like, that's
Speaker 4
Yeah.
Speaker 3
Cute story.
Speaker 4
Yeah. It it was pretty cool. So then I was like, okay. Well and I happen to be getting married, like, two months after she birthed. So I was like, alright. Now you're gonna come to my wedding. I'm gonna get married, and then I'm gonna get pregnant right after that. And I'm gonna, you know, do the whole wild pregnancy pre birth thing. And that's exactly what happened. Like, I got pregnant immediately. My wedding anniversary was July fifteenth, and my baby's three months old. So if you do the math, it was pretty crazy. So yeah. Then I was pregnant, and, yeah, I decided I'm I'm gonna do a lot of pregnancy, especially because I'd heard all these stories, didn't trust the medical system, and I watched Natalie do it. So I was like, okay. I know someone who's done it. And, of course, everyone thought I was crazy. They're like, you're not gonna do ultrasounds, all this stuff. Side note, I also have a Instagram where I talk about, like, health and fertility and pregnancy and all of that. So I was, like, posting everything I was doing. And, you know, when it's your when it's your first baby, like, people judge you more. Like, they're like, you don't know what you're doing, especially being young. Like, being young and this is my first baby and being, like, public about drinking raw milk, not doing ultrasounds, you know, not hiring a medical person at my birth, all of that. So I did the
Speaker 3
How was that for you to navigate the public arena with all
Speaker 4
Yeah. In the beginning, it was hard. And I remember, like, think you know, I had fears in the beginning too. I was like, should I go just get one ultrasound? Like, how do I know, you know, it has its kidneys? And, you you know, I just wanted to know that it was okay. It was my first time being pregnant. I didn't know what pregnancy felt like. But I just texted some friends, and they're like, no. Look at these studies. Don't do it. Don't do it. And I was really just like, okay. If I get to the point where, like, the baby's kicking and I could feel a heartbeat and my intuition intuition is saying everything's fine, then everything is probably fine. And, yeah, just hearing online people saying stuff like, I, you know, I didn't wanna do ultrasound too, but then I did. And my baby you know, I thought about this and had to get induced and just people telling their stories. I had to, like, stop looking at comments for a while. And luckily, my husband was, like, very supportive, and he was like, just post what you need to post and don't look at what people comment. And so I did that, and a lot of people were quite grateful for that information to know that someone else was doing it and that that was a possibility to not engage in the medical system and to be able to drink raw milk and eat oysters and all of that during your pregnancy and drink a little wine or, you know, who knows what.
Speaker 3
Feel like a normal person doing what you want.
Speaker 4
Yeah.
Speaker 3
So tell me a little bit about your choice to do a wild pregnancy. Like, why not have a midwife for your first, like, all that nonsense? Like, what was the real draw? Like, I hear you that you've been exposed to the podcast. You were on a health journey. You'd already been totally disenchanted with the system, and you saw birth. Like, that's so dope. That's such a, like, you had got all the pieces for sure. And And why not do it the way that, you know, you're supposed to?
Speaker 4
Yeah. I think the real thing was I because I ended up kind of healing myself from the IBS. Like, I just really trusted myself and my body. And then every time I brought up, should I go do this? Should I go you know, should we hire a midwife? Should we do something medical? My husband's like, okay. What are you gonna do if they tell you your baby has this disease? Like, what are you gonna do? Are you gonna, like, go through all the tests and all this stuff? And I was like, no. I wouldn't wanna do that. I would just have my baby. You know? Or the worst case scenario, if I were to, like if it were to be stillborn, what would I do? I would still wanna have my baby at home. So we, like, went through all the scenarios, and it's like, ultimately, I'd rather be comfortable. I trust my body. I trust that whatever is gonna happen is supposed to happen. You know? And women have been doing this for how long? Right? Like, that was the thing. My husband kept saying, like, women just birth. Like, it's not a big deal. And me being pregnant and sensitive, and I'm like, oh my god. He doesn't think I'm special. Like, birth is so hard, all this stuff. But looking back, like, that was the best thing ever. Instead of him being like, well,
Speaker 3
what if
Speaker 4
this is wrong? Well, what if this is wrong? Well, both are true. Yeah.
Speaker 3
I mean, just birth, and it is special, and it is a big deal. It's all at the same time.
Speaker 4
Yeah. Yeah. I think he could agree with that now being in the situation. But, you know, beforehand, he was just very emotionally detached, not having gone through a birth. But
Speaker 3
But in kind of a way, I mean, keeping it pretty mellow and undramatic. Right?
Speaker 4
Which is,
Speaker 3
you know, way more chill to orient around for you than, you you know, some of these anxious dudes that are super controlling and super
Speaker 4
Yeah. Exactly. So looking back, I'm like, thank God he was like that because he trusted birth. You know? Like, he verbalized that every time I brought up an issue. He's like, women just birth. Like, you're just gonna birth.
Speaker 3
Good.
Speaker 4
So yeah. And That'd
Speaker 3
be a great T shirt. Women just birth. It's gonna birth. Yeah.
Speaker 4
So, yeah, I think, ultimately, I was just like, okay. Well, whatever happens, I'd rather deal with it myself. You know? Like, I don't wanna give over my authority to someone else. I trust myself more.
Speaker 3
Yeah. That's really it. Right? Like, when women grapple with these things, and many of them will come up with if something were to happen, I would want someone else to deal with it. You know? I would want someone else. And and and I think that's a really, like, yeah, pretty pretty significant, difference. Right? Like, when I imagine if if my baby came out and needed some support, the idea of someone else assessing my baby or putting their mouth or an equip piece of equipment on my baby, it's a no for me. Like, it it's just such a no.
Speaker 4
Yeah.
Speaker 3
You know? But it's because I fundamentally believe wholeheartedly that I really actually am the highest, likelihood to support my baby.
Speaker 4
Right.
Speaker 3
So I guess, arguably, someone else, like, wouldn't understand that or agree or believe that, and therefore, yes, someone else should take care of my baby. Anyway, I just think it's kind of an interesting point that it does kinda come down to that. Like, yes. Of course, things may happen, and how would you want it to go? And do you like the idea of handing your baby off and letting someone else deal with that and, like, for you hard no.
Speaker 4
Caught it. The other thing for me was, like, you know, posting online all the stuff and getting all this lash back and whatnot. I'm like, well, what if it goes right? And then I get to prove those people wrong. You know? That was kind of, like, a motivator for me. Like, okay. Well, one day, I'm gonna share my story and show that you can give birth without medical assessments. You know? Like, you can be healthy without someone testing your blood glucose level or whatever.
Speaker 3
Yeah. But then you're just lucky, man.
Speaker 4
Yeah. That's another one that I had to go back and reiterate. Oh my gosh. Yeah. It's crazy. I like to say I'm blessed.
Speaker 3
Oh, yeah. To do this in the public sphere, you know, I just think it requires, obviously, your own confidence and and all of that. And then also that, like, thick skin would kinda cover the point I'm about to make, but, like, these people are so brainwashed. They're
Speaker 4
so brainwashed so
Speaker 3
deeply programmed to hate and not understand and move away from the natural world.
Speaker 4
You know?
Speaker 3
And they're so disempowered, and they're so confused. Right? And and that that helps me a lot when I receive my stuff as I do. That's just like, oh, yeah. Yeah. Of course, you think like, with the right thing you just said, of course, you think that the ultrasound showed something that meant you needed to be induced. Like, I know that makes no sense, but, like, you were told that, and you don't know any better.
Speaker 5
And that's
Speaker 3
really scary and, you know, sad for you, but, like, I'm in a whole different consciousness.
Speaker 4
And Yeah.
Speaker 3
And I talk about this with Yolanda all the time that when you're in the public arena like we are I mean, everyone is nowadays because anyone can have a public Instagram. But but at the at the scale that that we are, it's like you're hitting all these different layers of consciousness, and you just have to be prepared to understand that that when you throw something out, you you're gonna hit all the layers. You're gonna hit hit the low consciousness. You're gonna hit the the plagiarist, you know, consciousness, the copycat consciousness, the the trouble consciousness. Like, you're gonna hit every layer, and it's fine if you know to expect that.
Speaker 4
Right.
Speaker 3
Have to, like, rock you so much.
Speaker 4
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Very interesting. Yeah. The whole luck thing, I yeah. People don't understand. You know? Like, I've been thinking about this for many years, and I think the biggest thing is that you just have to trust because, you know, even if I would have gotten medical examinations, maybe I had gestational diabetes, and I had no idea. Maybe, you know, my baby, I don't know, had meconium or whatever in the womb, and I had no idea. I think that just trusting my body was the best thing for me. Yeah.
Speaker 3
Anything else you wanna share about your pregnancy and the work of it or the end of it or anything at all?
Speaker 4
I mean, I didn't have a perfect pregnancy. Like, I had days where I was throwing up a lot. I had days where, like, for one day, I ate stevia on accident and, like, vomited, you know, the entire next day. So definitely didn't have a perfect pregnancy, but I didn't have I had fears, of course. I'm like, what if my baby doesn't have a finger or whatever? What if my baby comes out and he's stillborn? But I just kind of sat with those fears. I talked to other women about those fears. And then at the end of the day, it's like, okay. Whatever is gonna happen, it's gonna happen. So, yeah, it was not easy, but it was simple. Like, I'd, you know, I would rather deal with those fears myself than get in the car and drive to some doctor and have him tell me, you know, tell me something that's wrong that might not be wrong or,
Speaker 3
you know, whatever. Yeah. Okay. So anything else you wanna share before you head into your free birth?
Speaker 4
I think we're I'm ready. So it's funny because my mom's due date was April tenth for me, and I was born on the fifth. And my sister was also born, like, a couple days early from her due date. And my due date for my baby was April tenth, so it was, like, full cycle. It was really cool. So I was like, oh, my baby's gonna come early because my mom, her, you know, her two children came early. That didn't happen. So I hit my due date, and I'm thinking, great. I'm gonna be pregnant forever. Oh my gosh. What if I do go to forty two weeks? And, you know, start having all the thoughts that you've probably heard a million times. So that night, I had to drop something off at UPS. Like, I ordered the wrong something and had to exchange it. So I'm going on the walk, and I felt like I really had to, like, pee or just, like, I was uncomfortable. I don't know what was happening. So I was like, okay. Let me go home and, like, try to use the bathroom. And as I'm walking home, I start to get I got, like, the contraction that was, like, when you know it's the real one, it's the real one. And I was like, oh, boy. But then I was like, you know, before I had, like, all these little things, I had tons of Braxton Hicks. I had some nights where I was, like, cramping and, like, had the diarrhea in the middle of the night or whatever. So I was like, okay. I wanna make sure this is real. So I just waited a few minutes, and my husband was working from home. So he was just finishing up work. So I just kinda snuck back inside, went to the bathroom. And I was like, okay. I'm gonna tell him. So I told him, like, Steven, I think I'm going into labor. And he starts freaking out, which is hilarious because he's so like, women give birth. It's whatever. It's not a big deal. And, of course, when the moment happens, he's the one that's freaking out. And we had planned on going to church that night, which is always our dream vision for the birth. We're like, okay. We're gonna go to church. You're gonna start labor. There's gonna be pretty music. It's gonna be dark at night, and then we'll go home, labor a little bit more, and then you'll have a baby in the middle of the night when no one's around because we're in an apartment on the first floor. So I was really worried about neighbors and landlords and all that stuff. So we go to church, and he was like, well, you know, what if it really starts to pick up? And I have because he was serving in the altar, so he was gonna be separate from me. And he was like, what if I what if you have to leave? What if I have to Uber home? All this stuff. And I was like, it's gonna be fine. We have, like, plenty of time. Don't worry. I was like, I'll and I was like, well, what if I have to go to the bathroom and then you think I leave and then you freak out? So I was like we, like, had this whole discussion. I was like, I'll leave my coat on the pew so you can, you know, know that I'm still there. But it turned out fine. It was lovely. And, you know, I saw people that were that knew I was pregnant. They were like, oh, you're gonna have the baby soon. I'm like, yeah, real soon. And yeah. So it started then, and then we went back home. We decided to watch a TV show because I was like, okay. I need to, like, chill, you know, and try to sleep. So I need someone to relax me. But we're watching the show. I'm having, like, a contraction here and there, and then I was like, oh my gosh. I need to clean one more dish. There's one dirty dish and seemed like I need to go clean that right now. So I went and cleaned it. And then I was like, okay. There's no way I'm going to sleep. I think it was, like, eleven PM at this point. And in the moment, it didn't feel like things were, like, picking up, but looking back, it definitely did. And then I really felt, like, so uncomfortable. I could just not find a comfortable position. I was, like, in the bedroom with my, like, butt up on hands and knees, and I was like, no. No. No. I really have to pee. And then I'm trying to go sit on the toilet, and then I was like, no. No. No. This isn't working. I would get on hands and knees to the floor. And I would just go, like, back and forth of those three things, like, continuously, like, nonstop for, I don't know, maybe an hour or two. And then at one point, I heard just like a and I was like, oh, my water broke. But it was literally, like, the amount that would fit in my palm of liquid. Like, it was it didn't, like I guess it just tore. I don't know. But I was like I have the story in my head that, like, once your water breaks, like, things really start to pick up. And so I was like, okay. Call the birth keeper because we did have birth keeper at our birth. And, yeah, I told myself I was gonna do it alone unless I found someone that was, like, totally aligned. And so she came over. Well, she was on the phone. She was like, let me hear her. And I was just, like, moaning. And so she was like, Steven, feed her water. Give her some Jell O or something. So I was like, didn't wanna drink, didn't wanna eat, but I was like, fine. And then I remember putting my hair in a bun, and I was still sort of conscious at this point because I was like, it needs to be cute for photos. So I'm like fixing my hair in the middle. And yeah, so that was at about midnight. And then I did have a birth pool that I bought from a friend that was used, like, a while ago. And I did I wanted the birth pool, but I wasn't sure. I just, you know, had it as an option. So they started filling it up, and I wanted to wait until I, like, really needed it. So, birth keeper came over. She find
Speaker 3
her? Tell me about that setup.
Speaker 4
Yeah. So after seeing Natalie's birth, she was part of the membership. And I was like,
Speaker 3
what woman that you
Speaker 4
Yes. No. Natalie is the one the birth that I went to the friend. Yeah.
Speaker 3
Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 4
So she was like, oh, let me connect you to the people in New Jersey. So I got connected to people in New Jersey, and then I joined the membership. And so I found her through there. And You found
Speaker 3
her through the through the lighthouse? Yeah. Oh, cool. Okay.
Speaker 4
Yeah. So I was like, okay. I'm going to meet up with her and just see how it is. Because the real thing was, like, my husband was like, who's gonna clean it up? And I wanted, like, some womanly support. You know? So, anyway, so I met up with her, and our first meeting was going on a hike together with her dog, which was awesome. And, yeah, she came over to my house a few times. She her and her husband brought over dinner for us a few times. I went to her yoga classes a few times, and we just had a really good relationship. And it was just nice to have someone to talk to. And she was totally like, yeah. You're gonna do this. You know? So, yeah, we were totally aligned. So she came over and just kind of, like was like the calm, peaceful voice, the birth that, like, open your body, you know, that sort of thing. And my husband's, like, asking questions. He's like, what is that? How do we know when she's, like, really in it? How do we know when she's in transition? Because, you know, he's very logically minded. So, you you know, we did all these birth education things, and he was, like, very calculated. And, she was like, it's okay. Just trust. Just trust. So there was, like, all these two voices just in the background. But I their conversations, like, went over my head. So then, yeah, back to the birth. So I'm in the bathroom. She comes over. And at this point, I can't open my eyes. Like, when she walked in, like, I couldn't look at her. I just couldn't open my eyes. And I was, like, trying to see how many contractions I could go until I'm like, okay. I wanna get in the birth pool. So I think around, like, two AM, I got in the birth pool. And, yeah, I was just I was, like, leaning forward on the edge of the birth pool, and that was the only position that I could go through contraction. I felt like once I had started in that position, that was it. And then I would kind of lean back in between contractions. And, actually, a lot of women are like, I like the breaks, but I didn't really like the breaks because it just, like, made me anxious for the next contraction, you know, which was interesting. And the sensation started from, like, I really had to use the bathroom to, like, lower back pain. Like, I could feel him moving down the birth canal. And then I felt like I had to push, so I didn't tell anyone. I just started pushing. And then eventually, like, thirty minutes, twenty three I don't know what the time was. But eventually into pushing, I'd tell them, like, oh, I've been pushing. Like, the the head is coming. And I checked myself. I could feel the head. And so, yeah, it was just crazy. Like, there was actually no drama. Like, I was joking. I was like, this is gonna be so boring for Emilee because this story is so undramatic. Like, there's nothing like, it was just it happened. Like, I just birthed. And so, yeah, his head came out. He came out with, like, his hand up like this, like a nuchal hand. And no one told me that, which I'm glad because, you know, everyone was like, well, my husband and the birth keeper, they were behind me. And I could just kind of hear them, like, whispering, and he's like, oh, blah blah blah. And, yeah, I was just bearing down, making super loud noises, felt like it was impossible to get the head out. Like, I was like, there's no way. But, like, once you're there, you just you gotta do it. You know? Like, you gotta do it. I thought I was gonna have, like, this psychedelic experience, but that didn't happen for me. It was like I was focused. So I was like, let's get this thing out. Like, I'm ready. So once I felt his head, I was super motivated because, you know, in between the getting into the birth pool and before then, like, I was like, I don't know how long this is gonna be. Like, I have no idea. And then the sensation changed to lower back, and I was like, okay. I don't know how long this is gonna be. And then I felt the head, and I was like, oh, man. It's coming soon. So, yeah, he was born around five AM, so I was in the pool for, like, three hours. And I think so his head came out, and then I had the urge. I was so over it. Like, that took everything out of me to get his head out. Like, I had no, like, contractions coming. I just, like, had a second to breathe. And I was like, can I pull him out? And my bird keeper was like, no. Wait for the next contraction. And I think I, like, reached down there and tried to, like, grab him. I don't know. I was just, like, ready, but it wasn't gonna happen. And so I'm glad I didn't, pursue that any further. And then the other thing that was super interesting is that I stayed in the water, which I'm glad I did, because if I would've come out, then his and his head was out. So he would've tried to breathe, and then I would've had the birth on land. So, yeah, his head or his body came out I think we looked back at the video, it was, like, two minutes after his head. So there was two minutes of me just, like, catching my breath. And then I, yeah, had to push I didn't have fetal ejection reflex. I just had to push him out. And, yeah, then he came out, and I was like, oh my gosh. It's a boy. I did it. Wow. Like, this is crazy. And my husband's like like, he was, like, sobbing. It was so funny. And then I think I tried to breastfeed him, like, immediately. I'm like, oh, you want boobie? Like and then he's like, you know, it just came into the world, and I'm, like, shoving a boob in his face, and he he wasn't ready. But, yeah, it was really funny because my whole pregnancy, I thought it was a girl. And then the night I went into labor, I had these two pair of pants. One of them is, like, a reddish pinkish and one of them is blue. And I put on my blue pants because I was like, I think this might be a boy. So that was interesting. But, yeah, then once, like, I realized what was happening and kinda came back down into my body, I was like, oh my gosh. I'm so uncomfortable. This placenta needs to get out of me, like, right now. So I think that was, like, in the court span of, like, five minutes. I go and sit on the toilet, and I hear, like, a pop. And I was like, was that it? Like, I didn't feel, like, much relief, and I think it was just, like, a, you know, some other gunk. And then we're just, like, talking, talking, then it just pops right out crazy into the toilet. So she grabs it from the toilet. I grab the baby. We all, you know, do the walk to the bedroom. And, yeah, it was dark. It was five AM. No neighbors around. No people. No light. It was absolutely perfect. And I just got into the bed, got on the trucks pads, and was just like, wow. I did it. You know?
Speaker 3
Oh. Yeah. How'd nursing go?
Speaker 4
It was good. My boobs are quite large, so it was, like, hard to navigate at first. Like, I was like, I signed up for a baby, but I did not sign up for carrying these things. But, yeah, he latched. We found out he had or we noticed he had a tongue tie. So I think that was kind of restricting him in the beginning. We were like, oh, now do we go to the doctor to get the tongue tied? We're like, you know, let's wait, and now it's not a problem at all. I think he just needed to adjust. But yeah. I mean, at first, it was he latched, but it was just painful for the first couple weeks. And I just had, like, a lot a lot of milk, so he would, like, often choke. And my letdown was, like, super powerful, so I had to navigate that. And, yeah, now he's he's great. He's fifteen and a half pounds at three months old, which is really big.
Speaker 3
Mhmm. Love it. So how would you say that having a sovereign birth has changed you as a woman?
Speaker 4
That's a good question. I mean, I just feel like I need to share my story more. Like, I feel like I was given this experience of just, like, not going to the doctor and having a fine birth. No drama. To be able to show people, like, you don't have to wait until you're a second kid. You don't have to wait until, you know, you're traumatized the first time. You don't have to wait until you're older, more educated, whatever. Like, you can do it. You know? Like, you just you have to trust yourself and be intentional and do all the things. So I think it just made me like, I'm very grateful to have this story to be able to share, and I just, like, wanna tell people. You know? And it's really hard because you don't wanna be in people's space. You kinda have to meet them where they are. And so, you know, one of my friends reached out to me because they're like, oh, yeah. We read your story on Instagram. Like, I'm pregnant now. Like, how did you combat fatigue in the first trimester? Just, like, asking those questions, and I'm just like, oh my gosh. They have no idea. But I'm like, okay. Well, you can't fight it. You have to surrender in the beginning because if you can't surrender in the beginning, you're not gonna surrender in the end. You know? So it's like, I have a much larger Mhmm. Like, I see the bigger picture now. So So I'm able to, like, help women when they're focused on, like, these details. I'm like, that doesn't matter. Just, you know, like, you gotta look at the big picture here. Yep. Awesome. Yeah. It's been really cool too. Like, my husband's parents were pretty nervous about the home birth. And, of course, we told them, you know, we're we're gonna have someone there, all this stuff. So it's been nice to, like, open their mind because now they're like, oh my gosh. You're our grandchild, he's so calm. He's so attentive. He's so this. He's so that. And it's like, well, yeah. It's for a reason. You know? He was he's been with me since birth. Like, he had you know, he's born into the world without No luck. Lights. And, yeah, it's not it's not luck.
Speaker 3
I know. My mom does that too. Or she's like, I just I can't believe I can't believe, you know, when when he's with with our when she's with our second now, she's like, I can't believe you guys got another one like this. I'm like, mom, it's not like a random lottery.
Speaker 4
Like Yeah. Curated these children to be, like,
Speaker 3
highly contented and adapted and, you know, healthy and intact, and it's funny.
Speaker 4
Yeah. That was super interesting to me postpartum because I immediately started having anxiety about having to do that again. Like like, this one went so well. Like, what you know? I have to do that again and then to go so well again. But, you know, now I've kind of worked it out, but immediately postpartum, like And I I also realized, like, birth is supposed to be hard because then postpartum seems easier. Because I didn't think of postpartum. You know? I'm just like, oh, I'm gonna have a baby, and I'm gonna breastfeed. And, like, I had no idea. No idea. And that what? I had no idea that, like, you know, well, one, my body just felt so weird. Like, my stomach was completely empty. It was like I was just, like, ahead and legs, and the middle was, like, all wonky. And so just, like, walking around the house, like, going into my kitchen the first time, I was just like, what is like, what the hell is this? Like, I have no idea what this reality is anymore. You know, just trying to process that and, like, you know, leaking everywhere, leaking out of my boobs, leaking out my eyes, leaking out, you know, like, bleeding everywhere, and, you know, visitors coming over and they're, like, wanting to see the baby, and you're just like,
Speaker 3
I
Speaker 4
can't right now. You know? Like and it's just yeah. It's crazy. I had no idea that postpartum was gonna be like that. Realizing that, like, I wasn't gonna be able to just spend time with my husband whenever anymore. Like, he was like, you have a new boyfriend. Like, you have this whole, like, emotional thing. And, yeah, there's just, like, so much to work through, and it all happens like this. It's crazy. But then, like, three months postpartum, I'm like, okay. I feel more normal. You know?
Speaker 3
Three months is usually a good good turning point.
Speaker 4
Yeah. Pretty sure. For sure. Awesome. Yeah. And, like, in the beginning, you know, you're just so out of it. Like, I was looking back at photos, and I was using a burp cloth as a blanket for the first, like, several weeks just because my brain was so you know, I had all the stuff to process. Yeah. I was using a burp cloth as a blanket.
Speaker 3
I don't think that's weird.
Speaker 4
There's a little burp cloth. That was but I, like the thing is I had, like, forty blankets of your face.
Speaker 3
Yeah. That doesn't matter. Yeah.
Speaker 4
I just thought it was funny. Like, you don't realize how how out of it you are.
Speaker 3
Or, like, another way of saying it is how in it you are. True. Like, you're in your primal you know, like, what blanket goes on your baby doesn't matter at all when you're there in it. You know? It feels like you're not with it because you're used to being very controlled and composed and measured, and it's not really like that in postpartum. Like you said, you're leaking, you're bleeding, you're crying, you're you're, like, so fucking raw. But Yeah. That's the jam. Like, that's when you're, like, going from the caterpillar to the butterfly. You know? Yeah.
Speaker 4
Yeah. It just blows my mind that, like, every woman that's a mother doesn't just wanna, like, talk about her birth and, like, that experience. Like, it's like, no one talks about it.
Speaker 3
Like, I'm like them or not. That's, like, wondering, you know, why women don't wanna talk about their rapes. You know? Right. They're not walking around with euphoric, beautiful, simple stories like you are. You know?
Speaker 4
Yeah. That's a good point.
Speaker 3
It's very complicated for you know? And and at that same time, I do think women wanna talk about it even when it is traumatic. I mean, I I just am a freaking magnet for it whether I am in the mood or not. You know? Like, I I had I was on a flight somewhat recently, and this woman was, like, late seventies. And I did not tell her anything about my work. And she just started, like, telling me about her traumatic birth back in the whatever it it would have been, the seventies or something, sixties.
Speaker 4
That's crazy.
Speaker 3
Yeah. I was like, damn. She's probably never had anyone hear her. You know?
Speaker 1
Yeah.
Speaker 3
And then the real, like, the real move, you know, for us being aware of this is to, you know, create relationships and friendships and community that can hold all of it, that can hold the pain and can hold the traumatic stories and can hold these kind of stories and that they're not sitting in any sort of, you know, power dynamic so that welcome. And when that can get done, you see a lot of healing and a lot of growth happen in a community.
Speaker 4
Yeah. Absolutely. Yeah. One thing is, like, just all moms now. I'm just like, well, you gave birth no matter how it was. Like, that's crazy. You know? So I feel like I have this, like, bond with other moms that I didn't expect to have. I'm like, oh, I'm only gonna bond with, like, crunchy moms. But it's like, no. Any mom. Like, that's like, you give birth. If you grew a human, you give birth. That's wild. Yeah.
Speaker 3
Beautiful. Well, thank you.
Speaker 4
Yeah. Of course. Thanks for your time. Yeah. Do you wanna look at any more of my birth pregnancy postpartum experience? I'm on Instagram at the olive oil queen. Yeah. I kinda use that as, like, a postpartum diary, which Yeah. People appreciated more than I realized. So
Speaker 3
yeah. Awesome. Thanks, girlfriend. Nice to connect.
Speaker 0
I hope you enjoyed the show today. You can support this podcast by donating to it through the link in the show notes below and, of course, leaving an awesome review on whatever platform you listen on. The more reviews, the more visibility the show gets, so let's spread the good word of sovereign birth. Don't forget, you can watch our podcast interviews on YouTube and see the women as they tell their birth and power stories, and you'll also find our viral free birth collection of epic raw birth videos on our YouTube. Make sure you're subscribed to our channel. We've always got a lot going on at Free Birth Society, and you can find out all about it at free birth society dot com, at free birth society on Instagram, and opt in to my newsletter below. We offer courses on free birth, authentic midwifery, the blood mysteries, as well as one on one coaching, in person retreats, and of course, our annual women's gathering, the matriarch rising festival. Our exclusive private, vetted membership, ship, The Lighthouse, is definitely something to check out if you're looking for a community of wise sisters to get guidance from and to meet in real life. Together, we rise sisters. We must speak our stories, fully claim our lives, and support one another. This is the living revolution, and I am so grateful to be in it with all of you. I'll leave you with our gorgeous free birth society theme song, Wild Woman by Aruba Red.
Speaker 6
I honor you for the wisdom you held,
Speaker 5
the ancient traditions of plant medicine and womb magic. I feel the spirit of the ancestors as I place my hands upon my belly. This sacred portal will be honored. Eons upon light beams of survival, withstanding the eradication of our power by design. I will not allow the separation of our young to be forced upon me. My sisters will no longer birth in captivity. The picket line redefined from burning our wild women to paralyzing us and drugging out babes. Strapped down in a clinical white bed, drying up the milk from our breasts, keep your needles. My family will never again be doomed to chase those dragons or your poison. We reject your fear. We choose love. Everything with intention. Death, ascension. I will fly and bring her back from the star.
