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Welcome to the Free Birth Podcast, a supportive space for people who are learning, exploring, and celebrating their autonomous choices in child childbirth. Together, we'll unpack truths, share personal stories, and claim our ability to birth freely and intuitively. Here's your host, Emilee
Speaker 1
Saldaya.
Speaker 2
There are lots of different ways to interact with free birth society and our work in the world. We have our flagship course, the complete guide to free birth, which is an incredible online course jam packed with everything we think one would want to know to feel confident to birth in their power. We also recently released a companion course full of meditations, sacred rituals, and journaling prompts to support in releasing fear and tuning in to your ancient womb wisdom. We, of course, have our private membership if you're looking for a community of like minded, radical, and wild women, and you can apply for that on our website. We offer personalized one on one transformational coaching with a focus on learning the tools to move out of victim consciousness and into self responsibility, which is, quite frankly, freedom. And it's worth mentioning that if you've been drooling over our mother loving retreat in Dominican Republic this coming February, we do have a few spots left open, and you should totally come join us in a magical week in paradise. Find out more about all of this on our website, free birth society dot com. This week, we have Mari from Tennessee who shares her powerful and sometimes hilarious V back story. After Mari had a completely unnecessary surgical birth, she committed to doing it her way this time and navigated a wild pregnancy and a fearless VBAC.
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I would say literally when I got pregnant the first time. Before that, I had no thoughts, desires to have children. I just yeah. It just wasn't on my way plan until I met my husband. I don't know. I he must've did some type of witchcraft on me.
Speaker 2
I really do. Have all
Speaker 3
this man's babies. I just I don't want to. So, so I have to give a bit of back background on being him. So we got together. He wrote me on Facebook. We got together. We moved in together three weeks later. Two months later, I was pregnant. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Yeah.
Speaker 2
He wrote you on Facebook and didn't know you?
Speaker 3
No. Okay. We kinda knew each other. We live in the same city. We actually grew up down the street from each other and didn't know it.
Speaker 2
That's adorable.
Speaker 3
We kinda you know, just kinda knew from the city, but he wrote
Speaker 1
me on Facebook and was like, hey.
Speaker 3
I would love to take you out sometimes. Boom. Been talking ever since. Moved in three weeks later. You know? Done deal.
Speaker 2
Just on.
Speaker 3
Yeah. So I got pregnant two months later, and it was intentional.
Speaker 2
Wow.
Speaker 3
It was very intentional, but I don't think I had really thought about what having a child means. It didn't hit me until I was pregnant.
Speaker 1
Sure.
Speaker 3
Because before that, I I was oh my gosh. I thought breastfeeding was disgusting. I was just I was not the person I am today. I don't know. Wow. But all of that changed. I started researching stuff. I had more natural minded friends teaching me about vaccines and everything, and I I would definitely say that's when my mother journey started. That's when I got passionate about everything. Mhmm. Like, fuck all of this. I wanna do it this way. Why has no one told me about this?
Speaker 2
Yeah.
Speaker 3
So, yeah, it it it started right then there two thousand and fifteen. So I didn't I didn't have any knowledge about care providers. I didn't know if I wanted an OB. Didn't really know anything about midwives. But one woman I know suggested I go to this midwife in my town. Okay. So I make an appointment with her. I know from the job not what I wanna do. She didn't care about any of my questions. It was just kinda like, okay. We're gonna do this, this, and this, real in and out type of appointment. I don't like hospitals to begin with. It just it didn't sit right in my spirit. So I was like, no. Can't do this. I get on Google, start researching about alternatives, find out about midwives. I go to the first midwife that I found in my city, which was first mistake. First mistake. Please always do your research. But I go to the first midwife I go. I find she was cool. I'm not even gonna lie. We had prenatal sessions, taught us a lot. Breastfeeding, vaccines, everything that obstetricians are not gonna teach you, I learned from going to this midwife. In the end, though, when I was about thirty I was actually exactly thirty nine weeks pregnant. I don't know. It's like she started getting irritated. I don't know. Maybe because she had so many clients. But she told me my fundal height wasn't increasing, which we know is a damn lie because as you get further into the pregnancy, it can stop increasing. It can even decrease because the baby's getting lower. Duh. I know this now. At the point at that time, I I didn't know any better, though. So she sends me to the hospital for, like, three or four ultrasounds. Why didn't anyone tell me how dangerous ultrasounds are? Aw. But yeah. So we get to the hospital. They're like, yep. Your frontal height is decreasing. Baby's not grooming. You have low fluid. Baby's cord is around his neck. Just, you know
Speaker 2
All the stuff.
Speaker 3
Stuff. Stuff that they like to say. So I'm crying. My midwife's like, I think you need to go ahead and go to the hospital, get induced. Yeah. So my husband drags us to the hospital. He's trying to motivate me. I'm bawling my eyes. Oh, bravo. I don't wanna go to the hospital. This is not I planned on having a water birth at the midwife's home. That's what I wanted to do. But get to the hospital. They induced me with Cervidib. That didn't work. I only progressed to one sitemir, duh, because my body's not ready. They tried to give me Cyto Tech. I did a quick Google on that, and it was like no. So I told them no. Nurses like, oh, you don't know what you're talking about. You can't believe everything you read on
Speaker 2
the wall. Yeah. Oh my god.
Speaker 3
Not gonna do this. Not gonna do this. So then they give me pitocin. Don't know why I'd allowed that, but they gave me pitocin, had me in labor for over twenty four hours. I only produce I I wanna say to two centimeters. Wasn't working. Then all of a sudden, the doctor comes in the room and was like, you have preeclampsia. We need to do an emergency c section. Wow. I feel fine. Exactly. And now looking back, even even if I hadn't done what I'm about to say, I I should have known. But after all this happened, I got I requested my medical records, and I did not have preeclampsia. I guess I could just back up. I'm sorry. But, anyway, preeclampsia diagnosis, emergency c section. Horrible. I thought I was gonna die. Ugh. Givering, shaking. There's, like, twenty people in the room. No lie. A bunch of interns all just, oh my god. Look at this sir. This you know what I'm saying? Like, that's what they get off on. And it pisses me off. Like, I'm an experiment for these people. We are literally experiments for them. But yeah. So c section, my son is perfectly fine. There's nothing wrong with him. Nothing wrong with him. After they bring him back in the room, they do tell me that, his blood sugar was a little bit low, so we gave him some formula. Yeah. So would my colostrum not be enough? Oh, well, it's hospital protocol to just give formula.
Speaker 2
How violating.
Speaker 3
Exactly. But at that point, I'm so, you know, out of it and traumatized.
Speaker 2
I can't What can you do?
Speaker 3
Yeah. I can't yeah. There's one so there's nothing I can do. I can't I I'm I'm not gonna fight this. I'm not gonna fight.
Speaker 2
You can't.
Speaker 3
Exactly. You can't. I mean, what am I gonna do? Nothing.
Speaker 2
Oh. But yeah. Able to nurse your son?
Speaker 3
Yeah. I was. Perfect. I I kept calling the lactation, lactation consultant because I was having some trouble. I was, like, getting him to latch. But, yeah, I was determined. There was no there was no way he was gonna form. No way. So, yeah, that went perp he was perfectly fine at birth. Had no problems. Like I said, I did go back probably about a year later and requested my medical records, and nothing was wrong. No preeclampsia. All my labs, perfectly normal. They told me my placenta was faulty, but they did a report. They did a report of the placenta, and it said placenta was normal, healthy looking. Wow. All of this. So completely lied to me.
Speaker 2
It's like a script that they learn. I mean, this is such it's it's painful that this is such a common story.
Speaker 3
You know? It's like Yeah. Oh,
Speaker 2
okay. IUGR into induction, into c section, into Mhmm. Messed up blood sugars, into formula. I mean, it's just such a racket.
Speaker 3
Exactly. And they want us to fail. They, like, literally want us to fail. They just want us to but no.
Speaker 1
And I
Speaker 2
I think it's important to always point out here that your body not responding to forced induction actually is the most intelligent thing your body could have done. Right? Because your body was trying to protect your son and be like, no. Do not open and release in this environment.
Speaker 3
Oh, for sure. Yep.
Speaker 2
You know? So yeah. You already you already know.
Speaker 3
For sure. And I know that, Nikki. I wish I would have known that back then. I wish I would have known how common this script is for them. You know? Because afterwards, I started talking to the other women and, you know, a lot of them, it's still normal for them. They still don't even know that this is a script. This this is what they're doing. We're experiments. But yeah. Yeah. Yeah. At all.
Speaker 2
Okay. So how does that inform your your first year of motherhood?
Speaker 3
Look. So, I think it actually and it shouldn't have to be like this. You shouldn't have to go through trauma in order to do things the, quote, unquote, right away. But I think it pushed me over that edge. Now I'm like this super crunchy mama. Like, I've been there getting more crunchy every year. But, yeah, that first year, nothing but no. Nothing but breast milk, vegan diet. Definitely not vaccinated. None. I did everything, I think, except cloth diapering. I just started cloth diapering with this second baby. But, yeah, it's, like, pushed me over the edge with this life. I started talking to everybody. I worked a retail job. I would just, like, bring it up with customers. They're looking at me all weird. Like, my my coworkers knew I was this chick right now. Exactly. Totally. They talk to you about birth, natural attachment through parenting. No matter what, I'm going to.
Speaker 2
Well, and and, you know, this is the thing. Right? Is when you when when a woman experiences the cost
Speaker 1
Mhmm. Of,
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you know, what what got taken from you.
Speaker 3
Mhmm. Exactly.
Speaker 2
It's it's it's a big deal,
Speaker 1
you know.
Speaker 2
Of course. And so it lights that fire just like how and we're gonna get into your story. Just like when you experience the euphoria of a normal physiological birth, that also lights a fire in you. So
Speaker 3
The opposite.
Speaker 2
But it kind of in this yes. Totally opposite and yet, you leaned into that fire with both paths, you know, and really committed to being you and to being who you are meant to be as a mother. And, you know, you should never have had to have gone through
Speaker 3
Never. I felt so robbed, but at the same time, I'm like, if I wouldn't have gone through this, would I still have this mindset? And that's so crazy and fucked up to even thinking about it because I'm like, I don't wanna, you know, like, normalize my child. No. No. That's not what I'm saying.
Speaker 2
Well, I
Speaker 3
think it can be all of this.
Speaker 2
I think it can be all true because Yeah. I hear your point and I think that sometimes it has to be really bad for us to look for a better way, and that was really bad.
Speaker 3
Yeah.
Speaker 2
Like, maybe you would have had one of those quintessential midwifery assisted births where a lot of lame things still happened, but because it was out of the hospital, you would have been grateful for it, and then you wouldn't have
Speaker 3
you know, like, who knows? Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 2
But the point is you arrived to where you arrived into your power.
Speaker 3
Exactly. I would not have known I would not have known firsthand what goes on in a hospital. Right. And I don't know what I mean. Just to back up a little bit. My recovery from my c section was shitty. Like, I couldn't walk. Husband had to give me a shower. I was in constant pain, popping all those pharmaceuticals. It was horrible. It was a completely traumatic experience that at the time, I didn't even realize how bad it was. Didn't even
Speaker 2
realize. Especially when so many of our friends are also getting c sections.
Speaker 3
Exactly. Exactly. It's just
Speaker 2
it's just a part of the fabric of our of our of our community.
Speaker 3
Yeah.
Speaker 2
So so fast forward a little bit into what happens first? You get pregnant with your daughter and then decide you're gonna free birth or do you decide yeah. Tell tell me about that.
Speaker 3
So, I wanna say my son was probably about a year or two after I had gotten my medical records, found out I didn't have preeclampsia. I'm on this whole crunchy bandwagon. I'm like, you know what? Why don't I have my own baby? I start seeing post. I hadn't ran into free birth society yet, mom, but I am friends with, one woman, Sudeka. You interviewed her. She's cool. Yeah. So her post, I'm just just randomly saying little things. It's just putting it into my universe. Like, why don't I have my own baby? My husband actually actually wanted me to do that with our first son, but it wasn't even on my radar.
Speaker 1
I was like, oh, god.
Speaker 2
Cracking me up the language you're using, have my own baby.
Speaker 1
Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it was like, I was I I
Speaker 3
even told him with our with our son. He was like, Mara, why don't you just do this yourself? I was like, that's illegal. I'll go to jail. What are you talking about? Like, it wasn't even an option Mhmm. To me, you know, which is so sad. It wasn't even an option. The universe just started putting stuff in my eye, and I was like, you know what? Next time I have
Speaker 1
a baby, I'm not gonna do any of that.
Speaker 3
I'm not gonna have a midwife. I don't want a doula. Nothing against doulas. They're great. I just I'm a very introverted person. I didn't want anybody in my space. I didn't want anyone here but my husband and my two well, he was two at the time. He's three now. And my two year old, I was like, I'm gonna do this on my own, and I'm gonna show everybody that I can do this. So, yeah, July no. June twenty eighteen, I get this. I can't even begin to describe it, really. But this this energy of a child telling me that she's coming, telling me, Mara, you need to get your diet right because I was eating crappy, And I just felt it. I started being drawn to rose quartz, and I was like, babe, I'm about to get pregnant. And it's said to be, girl. Yeah. He was like, whatever. You're crazy. I'm like, okay. Next month, I'm like, I think I'm about to have get pregnant. I go to a psychic, a local psychic, get a reading. She asked me if I'm on birth control. I'm like, no. She's like, oh, well, you surely is fertile. What the fuck are you talking about? I had totally freaked
Speaker 1
out. Yeah. That I had
Speaker 3
been getting this feeling. I wasn't even connecting, but couple weeks later, find out I'm pregnant. And after that, I'm like, yeah. Yo. This is this is this is really happening. Mhmm. This is really happening.
Speaker 2
Even just that, you know, like, even that is so paradigm shaking that, you know, the same thing happened with me. I totally felt my daughter before she was here, and and that a lot of people would look at that as crazy or that we're just making stuff up. But the more you talk to women, that is an extremely common experience.
Speaker 3
Exactly. Exactly. It's like they've they've gotten as
Speaker 2
a
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whole women so out of touch with themselves that they would never even, you know, be able to even tap into.
Speaker 2
Or that when we do, it's so quickly labeled as, like, dark magic.
Speaker 3
You know? Exactly. Like, gosh. Like, can we not simply be in tune with our bodies and our spirits and our babies that are coming? Can we not? Okay.
Speaker 2
So you're so you get pregnant with your with your daughter and Mhmm. You're already aligned with free birth.
Speaker 3
Mhmm. And so discovered Free Birth Society too by then, probably, like, a month or two.
Speaker 2
Nice. And so what is your pregnancy like? Do you have a totally wild pregnancy?
Speaker 3
It's perfect. Totally wild. Only professional I saw was a chiropractor. I started going, I think biweekly, at around four months. It was great. I had no extra pains. But, yeah, totally wild pregnancy. No ultrasounds. None of that. Nobody's seeing me. I got my own blood work done, which is totally not necessary. But I'm just a numbers person. I'm a super nerd, and I just wanted to look at it. You know? And I actually found out, like, about hemoglobin, how doctors lie to women. When your hemoglobin has to be this much during pregnancy, it actually decreases during pregnancy. I found numerous studies that show if your hemoglobin is between eight point five and nine point five, then that's the best outcome. But yeah. Yeah. So I started finding out all this. Yeah. Totally without pregnancy. No no type of anything. I'm just chilling. I'm still working, but I'm just eating, relaxing, you know, using my natural herbs. Use I use magnesium oil on my body every day. Yeah. Totally wild pregnancy. No complaints at all. It was perfect. I stretched every single day, cooked a lot in cast iron, and I just relaxed. I don't even think I used a fetal scope, like, twice, but I wasn't concerned. Like, I know she has a heartbeat. Duh. I'm getting pregnant. I can feel the baby moving. I don't I don't need all of that extra stuff. I don't need anything to validate that there's a growing baby inside of me. I don't.
Speaker 2
Powerful. And your man is, like, all down with it?
Speaker 3
Oh, yeah. He's down. Okay.
Speaker 2
And and so tell me about the weeks prior to you going into labor. Was there was there much doubt or insecurity to navigate? Was there was it just, like, easy peasy and then you had to
Speaker 3
Yes, Emilee. Honestly, I I literally did not worry at all. Other people tried to put worries into me like when I would tell coworkers or anything. Oh, are you sure you can do that? Oh, what if what happened last time happens? Nothing happened, honestly. But, yeah, just trying to put down into my head, oh, what you're gonna do if this happens? Or who's who's gonna cut the cord?
Speaker 2
Right? Why is that, like, the most confusing thing to people?
Speaker 1
Do. Right.
Speaker 2
Like, who ties your shoelaces in the morning? Exactly.
Speaker 3
Oh my goodness. But, yeah, it was it's more people trying to put down on me. I remember telling one of my customers that I don't go to the doctor, and she looked at me like I had two heads, and I just walked off laughing. I love shocking people. It's just my personality. I'm a peppercorn. But, yeah, I I literally had not one ounce of worry.
Speaker 2
And none of that got to you? You were able to
Speaker 3
just crush it off. Probably the toughest skin on earth. So
Speaker 1
Nice.
Speaker 3
None of that. I was like, I'm gonna do this. And you can look at my Facebook. I'm gonna post it. So Mhmm. That it is what
Speaker 2
it is.
Speaker 3
So, at so everything's perfect. I roll around to thirty eight weeks and five days, you know, which is you know, I don't even like to go by weeks, but, you know, just for the sake of the story. Thirty eight weeks, five days. I start trickling. It's like nighttime. I wanna say it's like nine o'clock. So I get
Speaker 1
super excited. I'm like, babe, come here. Look. My water's trickling. Oh, man. I'm so excited.
Speaker 3
So So he's like, okay. We need to get stuff ready. We go to Walmart. We're just running around getting stuff. I'm not worried. And I because I know at this point, your water could gush, trickle, reseal itself for days, weeks. I'm fine. I feel fine. Wait.
Speaker 2
Some foreshadowing. How many times did your man go to Walmart in your grocery?
Speaker 1
I was one, two, three, four, nine. He told me twice.
Speaker 2
Just twice. Okay. That's not too bad. That's not too bad.
Speaker 3
So I started trickling. I had very mild contractions around them, but they fizzled out. So that's when we went to we both went to Walmart. We're there till, like, nine in the I mean, one in the morning.
Speaker 2
Oh my god. Stuff.
Speaker 3
Just getting stuff. There's so much stuff in Walmart,
Speaker 2
That's hilarious.
Speaker 3
Feeling. Get back home. I wake up eight o'clock next morning. There's a full gush of water. I'm like, oh, shit. It's gotten real. So I'm I'm still super excited. I'm still chilling. Still no contractions. So I just kept checking my temperature, you know, every few hours. I feel fine. After that full gush, twenty four hours goes by. I'm still trickling, you know, randomly. Forty eight hours goes by. Alright. I found Seventy two hours goes by. Yeah. So all of this started on Saturday. I didn't go into labor until Tuesday. Damn. Yeah. Saturday, March second, I go into labor on the fifth around four thirty. Straight off the back, it is consistent contractions, consistent waves. I figure out I have back labor.
Speaker 2
Wait. Okay. But before that, what is your head space like? Because that's a that's that's that's heady. That's a big how were you doing? Were you just still totally unwavered or were you tell me about those three days.
Speaker 3
I am made for this shit because I'm telling you, I did not worry. Like, literally did not worry. I'm chilling, watching movies, eating, you know, playing with my son. Like, there's no worry. There's no doubt in my mind. I didn't tell anybody, you know, so anybody could try. Smart. Because I didn't want anybody even though I'm not affected by anyone's words, I didn't want anybody sending me negative energy. So that's why I didn't, you know, tell Facebook. I'm I'm not doing all that. No. But, yeah, I I literally I didn't worry. Not one bit. I was just chilling. She'll come when she comes. Oh, well. But, yeah, from
Speaker 2
You knew enough at that point that that was a totally normal
Speaker 3
Yeah. Yeah. You're right. I should've mentioned that. I I I've done so much research that I'm like, I know this.
Speaker 1
I know I can go in
Speaker 3
a hospital right now and read a doctor or nurse. Like, I know more than you. Sorry. I know what I'm talking about. I know what I'm talking about. From going through free free birth society, Just everything. Speaking to you, speaking of other women's accounts, doing my research. I know what I'm talking about. There's no need to worry. I have faith in my body. So yeah. So set starts on Saturday. Tuesday, that's when I actually go into labor. My contractions start off around ten to fifteen minutes apart, then about eight minutes, then about three to four minutes, then about one to two minutes, consistent back labor. I'm not even gonna lie. It was horrible. It felt like I was being tortured by the CIA. Like, it was bad. And it was it was one to two minutes apart for the remainder of the time. I took three ibuprofen. I don't even take medicine. I don't even know why that was in my house. I took some after ease, rescue remedy, was using Annika, magnesium oil. I stayed in the birth pool for, like, five, six hours. Courtney, my husband, he just kept refilling it with hot water. My son's in there playing with me, hot shower on my back, rebozo, all of these things trying to relieve these waves. And it was just it was constant. It was constant. At about the twelve hour mark, this and I was like, oh my gosh. I don't I don't know what to do. That's when I reached out to you in the group. I was like, you know, I don't know what if this baby is transferred.
Speaker 2
You're like, I'm dying. Right.
Speaker 3
Do I have to go to the hospital? Like, I don't know. To happen. I don't know. I don't know what to do. You you just motivate me all the way. Oh my gosh. Their motivation was everything. That is what women need. I'm sorry. That is what we need. Yes. I'm doing all this. I'm freaking out twelve hours. By that time, it was almost over. It was the sixth. It was two o'clock. I remember I typed it in my phone, and I text you. Am I I'm throwing up. Is this normal? So I'm still having consistent waves back to back to back to back to back. I, all of a sudden, feel like I have to poop. And I know this is normal, but in that headspace and labor, I can't even think common sense. You know? So I'm like, babe, I gotta poop, but I'm constipated. I need you to go to Walmart and get me an enema. I need enema. I don't know where my my my my regular one is. I don't know. So he's like, who
Speaker 2
knows what I need.
Speaker 3
So he gets his clothes on real quick. Walmart is, like, two minutes from our house. But he goes to Walmart. He's FaceTiming me while we're in Walmart. I have a wave while we're on FaceTime, and her head comes out. Oh my god. Woah. It's the weirdest feeling ever, but I'm just stroking.
Speaker 2
It, babe. It wasn't Yeah.
Speaker 1
Exactly. I was like, well, I was like, babe. Her hair just came out. He was like, wait a minute. Hold on.
Speaker 3
I was like, I can't what do you mean? Hold on. I can't keep her in.
Speaker 1
He was like, okay. I'm coming home.
Speaker 3
So he he, we he hangs up, and I turn my my selfie camera on. I'm standing up in the bathroom. So a couple more waves, and it it was literally like my vagina was vomiting. She just came out. I didn't have to push. I think I had to, like, maybe bear down a little bit, but it it wasn't even painful. I don't remember feeling a ring of fire. It was just very intense. You know? And I'm pretty sure it had to do with me standing up in that position and, you know, just letting it happen. There was no one around me to tell me, oh, push now or a whole you know what I'm saying? I just it just it was normal. It was normal. It was it was f e r at its finest.
Speaker 2
And
Speaker 3
she just came out and yeah. It was beautiful. He came he walked in the door probably, like, two minutes later. I'm suctioning all the amniotic fluid from her nose and spin it's just very primal and just instinctive, and I was just in love. And, yeah, it was wonderful. But, anyway, so, couple minutes after, we're we're just gushing over her. We don't know if it's a he or a she right now. He's hoping for a girl. You know, I've been feeling feminine energy this entire pregnancy. So I asked him if he's ready to check the gender. We do. It's a girl. He goes screaming around the house. It's just the best experience ever. My three year old is looking like, I don't know about this. What is this little baby doing right here? But, yeah, it it was great. After that, we just chilled. I said, I think I called you because I was like, she's not crying forcefully. You told me that we not crying forcefully is normal for a baby that's been born peacefully. So, yeah, we chill. My husband had to tell me to sit down. I forgot that I was standing up all these minutes.
Speaker 2
Oh my gosh. Yeah.
Speaker 3
My placenta came out almost an hour exactly. Almost an hour. I put a bowl in the toilet and released it there. It was intact. I inspected it. We tried cord burning, but her cord was just so short. I don't know. Maybe I just have short cord babies because his cord was short too. But, yeah, her court was super short. We tried burning it, but it was just too short, so we just snipped it. One thing that I'll remember for next time is two eats. I don't know how I forgot, but I guess I was just on such a birth high. I forgot to eat for, like, two, three hours. I I got the shakes for about ten, fifteen minutes.
Speaker 2
Mhmm.
Speaker 3
But he got me some food. And after that, man, it was just so peaceful. We the baby didn't even wake up the first night. We slept for, like, eight, nine hours. It would knock us out. Yeah. And when I told people that after, they was like, oh my god. I would have been so scared. You know? That's just another we're not trusting our babies. We're not trusting our bodies. Like,
Speaker 2
Totally. Well, my baby slept for nine hours her first night.
Speaker 3
Really?
Speaker 2
Yeah. And it was Oh, they've they've
Speaker 1
been through labor with us.
Speaker 3
So It
Speaker 2
was such a gift.
Speaker 3
Yeah. Exactly. Exactly.
Speaker 2
But also, obviously, most women are being told you have to nurse every two hours and they're not co sleeping.
Speaker 3
Exactly. Exactly.
Speaker 2
There's never been a worry in my mind about anything with her because she's right next to me, but there's no way I would have been able to
Speaker 3
put in a separate yeah.
Speaker 2
Oh my god. I would have been waking up every twenty minutes.
Speaker 3
It does. Exactly. It just it doesn't make any sense. No.
Speaker 2
It really doesn't.
Speaker 3
None at all.
Speaker 2
So then how is this postpartum? How's your healing? How is nursing?
Speaker 3
Great. Postpartum. Besides the fact that somehow I pulled my hamstring giving birth, like and it didn't even kick in until, like, maybe a week later. I my chiropractor actually came to my house to give me a just I could not walk. But other than that, it was perfect. I had no complaints. I felt great. Tons of energy. You know, I still made sure I rested, chilled in the, bed as much as possible. My husband waited on me hand and foot. Love him so much. But, yeah, it was it was a completely opposite experience. It made me really realize, like, this is how it should be. There should be no fear giving birth, no apprehension. Like, man, this is a gift. It's literally a gift. I feel like a goddess. I am a goddess. Like, yeah. It was great. Totally opposite.
Speaker 2
Wow. Totally opposite. Wow. You just did it, man. You just were like, I'm gonna correct that shit.
Speaker 3
Yeah. I I I really did. I didn't tear. I'm trying to think nothing. Literally.
Speaker 2
I mean, you had a fearless birth.
Speaker 3
Yeah. Truly. It was it was just so, for lack of a better word, natural. It was just so natural. I got my placenta chilling in my fridge. We're probably gonna plant it, and grow a tree over it. But it was
Speaker 2
just That's sweet.
Speaker 3
Just the best experience ever. I wonder if my neighbors hurt me because I was screaming when I was in labor. They haven't said anything, so probably not. But, yeah, I can't I can't ever see me not doing it this way. You know?
Speaker 2
I just But once you've, I mean, once you've tasted the thing that society is trying to starve out of us. Mhmm. You know, once you've tasted it, it's on.
Speaker 3
It's like, yeah.
Speaker 2
And like what you said about with your son's birth, in a way you even tasted it because it was stolen from you.
Speaker 3
Mhmm. Exactly.
Speaker 2
You know, and it's within us and it's ours. It's always what's so comforting to me about all of this stuff is it's ours and it's only it's only the belief, the temporary, like, suspended belief that we forgot that it's ours Mhmm. Is what's going on. Because Yeah. It can be remembered in just one thought.
Speaker 3
Exactly.
Speaker 2
You don't have to, like, do anything other than remember Yeah. That it's ours. And then it's and then it's just taken back. Yeah. It's, like, really simple.
Speaker 3
That ancestral knowledge and wisdom that we all have that you can tap into. But if you choose to cover your eye, then you're never gonna you're never gonna experience this. You're gonna experience what they want you to experience. Exactly. And I refuse. I refuse. That's why I speak on this as much as I can, as much as I possibly can. So many women have told me, oh my god, Mari. You inspire me, motivate me. I wanna do this with my next baby. Oh my gosh. I didn't know this is an option. Just like with ultrasound, why didn't anyone tell me, my first baby, when I'm posting ultrasound on Facebook, how dangerous is it? Why is no one telling me? No one knows. Exactly. Exactly. And I I I just I refuse to sit back and just allow this wisdom to be forgotten to just
Speaker 2
I mean and and therefore, you've done it. It's living on within you. Exactly.
Speaker 1
And you
Speaker 2
are you are a living example of someone who remembered and then birthed in power. And so every woman that comes in your path, you know, you you became a lighthouse for the women in your in your community. It's so beautiful.
Speaker 1
I agree.
Speaker 3
I agree. I agree. All of us that have done this is I don't I we don't know what we're doing. They might try to come for us.
Speaker 1
Of course.
Speaker 3
But, yeah, it it was a beautiful experience. Beautiful experience. I can't wait to do it again probably a bunch more times. Yeah. He says I'll probably get tired after the fifth one, but I don't know. We'll see. Yeah. We'll see.
Speaker 2
Awesome. Well, do you have anything else to add, or do you feel complete?
Speaker 3
I just wanna tell women that you can do this. You are a woman. You are meant to have babies. If you can get pregnant, you can have your baby. You don't need anyone telling you what to do, when to do it, do it this way, or you have to get this done. No.
Speaker 2
You can do it. Period. And it's actually our biological imperative that we do do it our way because we know best for our children.
Speaker 3
Mhmm.
Speaker 2
And the fact that that became so radical to embody is fucking nuts.
Speaker 3
Exactly. They literally convinced generations that women can't have their own babies.
Speaker 2
And that we don't know what's best. Exactly.
Speaker 3
Like, we don't have the
Speaker 2
wisdom for our own offspring.
Speaker 3
No. It's a lie. It's a lie.
Speaker 2
Well, I'm so glad to connect with you today. I love your story and just such a
Speaker 3
Thank you.
Speaker 2
Powerful example of what's possible.
Speaker 3
Yeah. I agree. Thank you so much for having me on.
Speaker 2
That's it for today, everyone. Join us next week for another episode of the free birth podcast. Thanks for joining us, and remember, your body, your choice. Lots of love.
