Speaker 0
Welcome to the Free Birth Podcast, a supportive space for people who are learning, exploring, and celebrating their autonomous choices in childbirth. Together, we'll unpack truths, share personal stories, and claim our ability to birth freely and intuitively. Here's your host, Emilee Saldaya.
Speaker 1
There are many ways to interact with Free Birth Society. These include our incredible offering, the complete guide to free birth, which is the most comprehensive online course available on how to give birth in your power. We also have a beautiful free birth meditation program called the sovereign birth meditation series, designed to help you release your fears and actualize your dream birth. Our latest course is called Through the Veil, a profoundly personal, radical pregnancy companion program by Yolanda Norris Clark that offers the opportunity to travel with Yolanda as she moves through the last trimester of her most recent pregnancy and invites you into her birth room to witness the birth of her eighth child. And if you're looking for a deeper connection and the opportunity for sisterhood in community with radical, like minded women, the free Birth Society private membership is for you, and you can apply on our website to become a member. We also offer personalized one on one transformational coaching with a focus on learning the tools to move out of victim consciousness and towards self responsibility, skills that translate to freedom, not only in the context of birth and mothering, but in every area of life. And finally, we are offering all of you, our amazing listeners, the free gift of Yolanda's twenty minute birth affirmations audio recording, a gorgeous, soothing meditation that every pregnant mother should have. So just head on over to our website at free birth society dot com, sign up, and Yolanda's affirmations will be sent directly to your inbox.
Speaker 2
Hello. It's Yolanda here, and I'm so excited to tell you about my latest endeavor with Free Birth Society. It's called through the veil and it's an invitation for you to join me on the most profoundly intimate experience of my life and yours. The journey of moving through the birth process into the underworld of birth to be reborn as a new mother into a new family once again. Through the veil is a very raw, very real third trimester, birth, and postpartum week by week program that includes seventeen videos in which I discuss exactly how I prepare for my free birth, including so many of the messy, emotional, logistical, and relational issues that aren't often talked about in the conventional prenatal context.
Speaker 3
Through the
Speaker 2
Veil also includes the hour plus long documentary of my eighth baby's birth, an incredibly loving, incredibly vulnerable, gritty, agonizing, naked, and beautiful family birth that I'm so, so proud of. I really look forward to you journeying with me through the veil.
Speaker 1
Happy New Year, everyone. We are opening up twenty twenty with Mia from Denmark and her remarkable story of choosing to free birth her breech presenting son. Enjoy.
Speaker 3
Before before I called you, I, I I just asked the the birthing spirit and angels to enter, and I consecrated the moment, to the highest awareness for healing on Earth and humankind. So I I set the scene here in Denmark. Ready.
Speaker 1
Beautiful. Okay. That's a great way to start. So, you know, I wanna say at the top of this, I'm so happy to have you here because, you were someone who, in in my world, just kind of randomly reached out to me, and we did a pretty late in the game, you know, session together and you were in, you were navigating quite a pickle at the end of your pregnancy, which we're gonna get into. And so then, you know, sometimes I do those sessions with women and never hear from them again. And it was just so joyous to then receive your email and and the clip that we're gonna include in this episode. And and you are such an incredible example of writing your own story, even in the face of what could feel like no options.
Speaker 3
And and
Speaker 1
so, yeah, I'm just I'm so excited to have you here.
Speaker 3
Thank you, Emily. I'm excited to be here.
Speaker 1
So take me wherever you wanna start with, where where the story of your motherhood journey begins. Mhmm.
Speaker 3
So when you when when you ask me that question, I feel somehow I've always been a mother. Like, I've always had kids in my life. I I I come from a home where we all always had, like, foster children and, I'm a now I teach yoga to kids. And so I've always had a lot of kids around me. And I was wondering when am I gonna have my own kids? And then one of a sudden, I I meet this man and, well, we actually, made a child pretty fast who, who chose not to to come down. So I guess that was the the very first, mother experience, that I really felt inside myself. Yeah. But then half a year after, I'm pregnant again. And I'm pregnant with, like, a soul who wanted to come come down this time. And I knew, you know, I knew within a few days or maybe already after conception, I just felt pregnant. I just knew that I was pregnant. And and, of course, that was both overwhelming and incredibly beautiful to go through that pregnancy. And I just knew that I wanted to give birth at home. A free birth was not, I didn't know that existed at the time. But I, I got a private midwife who I really resonated with. She's I feel she's a witch in working within the the field of, yeah, of of pregnancy. And so we got along really well, and we did lots of ceremonies and went to the forest and danced and Nice. We spoke to the baby. Yeah. It was beautiful. We had fires in the snow and, just you and her? Just me and her. Yeah.
Speaker 1
That's so dope.
Speaker 3
Yeah. Yeah. I, like, went on a on a quest, into the spirit world in the forest, and I had, like, my question and and went in there. And suddenly, the spirits and the the trees, they started talking to me on on some level, and it was so beautiful. And so she really opened me to well, I I I knew it already that birth was a spiritual event, or and and pregnancy too. And So it was an inner journey. Mhmm.
Speaker 1
Quick question. So with a private so you're in Denmark and a private midwife means what exactly? It means
Speaker 3
I pay a lot of money to have a midwife who I know attend my birth.
Speaker 1
Versus the other option would be to get one through the through the government. Yeah.
Speaker 3
Yeah. I would need I would need to to go to the hospital to, like, get lit like, get listened to what is it? Monitored. Monitored. Thank you. And all of this measured. But, yeah. So this midwife, she would come to my home, and it would have to do with my my emotions and my longings and my, like, everything within pregnancy.
Speaker 1
Okay. So you hire her privately, but she's licensed?
Speaker 3
She's licensed. Okay. She's an authority. And of course, she has to adhere to rules and regulations from the hospital. But, yeah, she I so I knew her personally, whereas, where I live, you wouldn't know your midwife. You wouldn't have met the midwife who would then come to your home. And and I just didn't feel, safe like that. I felt very safe having her there at my first birth. Now that I look back, I'm like, I could totally have done that on my own, but at the time, I didn't know. Yeah. The way I remember it was that I had twenty nine hours of flow, and I was just, you know, in it. And I had my partner and my friend and my midwife and all the angels there. And, yeah, I was just flowing from room to room, and we did a ceremony where we called in the the archangels. My partner, he, he likes to work with the archangels and singing like ceremonial songs. So, we did that with the harmonium and my midwife had like a sermon drum. And, and I, I was having searches while we were singing. That was really beautiful. And, yeah, as I remember it, labor just got more and more intense. And I went into the water, but probably went in there too early because I stayed there for about six hours. And it was just it was a really, really long birth, and I was really tired at the end. But, like, spiritually and energetically, I felt, like, ready. But I also felt that, like, afterwards, I could see I I, like, sewn out sometimes. It was like I knew I was giving birth, but I didn't know I was giving birth. Like, I I wasn't really aware on some level of what was what was coming. But then after the twenty nine hours, my, instantly, like, my midwife is like, he needs to get out now. And so the whole energy completely changed. And I was in the water and, you know, I had prepared that I didn't want to push. And then one of a sudden, I'm told to push and she jumps into the water with me. Woah. And yeah. And and I just have to use all of my, like, like, physical force to to push and, and and she tells my partner to call the ambulance. And so so he does. Based on as I remember it, based on his his heart rate, like, falling and, him being on my, like, pelvic floor for too long. But as I remember it, I couldn't really feel his head at the time, so I feel he was pretty far up still. But it was just such a surprise for me that the whole field changed like that. And, and I remember being monitored, and that was just so painful. And then the monitor, I think, like, we all panicked somehow. It fell into the water. My friend was holding it, and she dropped it. And so then I needed to, like, be lifted up of the water and get monitored. It was just so painful. And at the same time, I knew that the ambulance was on its way, and they came within, like, five or seven minutes. But I I also remember being, like, extremely connected to the divine. Like, I was like, this this can be happening. Like, my baby is gonna come out now. And I just I was so, like, resting in that knowing that he might like, he needs to come out now. I didn't know it was a he at the time. But, then, like, she really, she, of course, also wanted the the baby to come out. And she told me, like, afterwards that that she was hoping that the baby would have come out, and then we could just have told the ambulance people to, like, walk away. But, it just got so dramatic. And and and she caught me a little bit. Yeah. And I was I remember just, like, screaming, but also trusting her that, okay. So this is what needs to be done. I was like, okay. Let's do whatever needs to be done to get this baby out. Emergency all
Speaker 1
of a sudden.
Speaker 3
Emergency. Exactly. Such a drama. And I was, you know, at the most open, vulnerable moment in my life, I remember, like, squatting over, holding my like, leaning back in the in the water, holding my arms on the on the edge. And my partner was behind me, and he was so supportive with, like, all the words he could find and and and, like, touching me. And she was sitting there in front of me, and I I had, like, really firm eye contact with her just, like, looking into feel our souls were looking into each other. Just didn't really want to do this, but we're doing this. Yeah. And then he didn't come out in the next push, and so it was cut a little bit again. Ugh. Yeah. Three times. And for the for the third cut, unfortunately, like, all the five people had come up from the ambulance. They were there. And, you know, they were just not in that space. And they were really trying to, like, get the attention of my midwife, but she was just so connected to me. She was not, like, she was not talking to them. She was still with me, wanting to get that baby out as well. And, and then they're like, this baby needs to get out now. You get one more push, and or we'll take you to the hospital. And then I'm just like, oh, fuck, bro. And then I get that one push, and I just push my baby out. And I I get him on my chest immediately. And I just I just remember that, like, in that exact moment, I I forgot that everyone was around me. It was so beautiful, like, that feeling of getting him up there. But then immediately, he, like, took my hand and put a needle into my oh my god. I'm just, like, reliving this. I've, yeah, put a needle into my vein, in case I needed something in the ambulance. And then they took me above the water, and we were on the fourth floor. So they put me in a wheelchair and, like, drove me all the way down naked with a blanket on. Yeah. And I remember my partner, he was just, like, whispering the most beautiful words to our baby, just, like, trying to make it as sacred as possible at the time. You know what? I was like, now I don't need to get to the hospital. Right. But they were like, yeah. You do. So they just they, like, they just took me to the hospital. There was no Ugh. Yeah. Girlfriend. I'm so sorry.
Speaker 1
I didn't know that part of your story.
Speaker 3
Damn. Yeah. Yeah. It took took a while good while to, to get over that because, of course, it was in my body. And, you know, they wanted to give me scintasone. Is that is that what it's called in English?
Speaker 1
Pitocin. Pitocin?
Speaker 3
Yeah. Okay. What you what you put in a woman to get her placenta out? Yeah. I yeah. They wanted to do that, but I was just just like, no. And he was, like, massaging my stomach in the ambulance. And I was just, like, holding my my baby and and my partner was sitting in the front. He wasn't allowed to be with us. So that was also, like, really, really emotionally traumatic for us afterwards and especially for my partner that he couldn't have those first, you know, ten minutes with with us. We were just, like, ripped apart. So do
Speaker 1
you think that that any of this was
Speaker 3
necessary? Yeah. At first, I did. At first, I afterwards, I, I believe so. Having, like, relived the birth several times and done physical, therapy, body therapy with another midwife has helped me to, like, release the trauma and and also, like, deep inside myself. Somehow I feel it wasn't necessary. Like, I my intuitive self didn't feel something was wrong. Like, of course, I was tired. But looking back at it now and having had a free birth now, finding out how, yeah, easy birth can be. I yeah. Somehow, I I I feel I could have done that. I could have birthed my baby. My instinct tells me that I I was totally capable of birthing my child, and he was fine. And as I've, like, researched, a baby's heart rate does lower once it's being pushed out or once it's descending. So, Right. Yeah. I don't know. And there could have been other reasons that I didn't know of. Somehow, you know, that birth also got me to free birth. So it was there for a reason. Mhmm. Yeah. You know, I was so sad. I was so sad that that had to happen. And, I was was and and and still am, worried if if that is going to affect my baby somehow. The the the first thing he, experiences in this world is to be, like, pushed out and then, like, having to leave and and and and everything being so rushed. And, you know, I had just imagined the moment of sitting there on the couch, just leaning into my partner, sitting with my baby, and just being there in bliss. So that was really traumatic for me that, yeah, that that didn't happen. But at the same time, like, I was able to say no to everything at the hospital. You know, they wanted to do all the things to me. And they wanted me to lie down and push out my placenta. They were like, it's not coming out. We need it to come out. And I was like, but I cannot, like, birth it while lying down on my back. Let me get up. And so I squatted and and it it comes out immediately. They do convince me to put, antibiotics directly into my blood just to prevent any, infections in my in my vagina. Yeah. So I I was so, you know, upset with myself that but they were just, like, really convincing me that it was going to be a huge problem for me. Stupid. Yeah. I, you know, I I, we for healing, we just created a womb afterwards for our baby and for ourselves. And so we and especially I and the baby just stayed in bed and kept ourselves in the center, throughout the next many months. So so that was really healing to connect on that level. And, you know, my my baby, now toddler, is the happiest baby ever. So I feel I feel that, you know, we all have traumas to work through, but I feel he's definitely in a good in a good place. And so, yeah, you know, we live our lives. I just nurse whenever my baby wants, and he's keeping me up at night. And I'm nursing him in the night. And then one of a sudden, I start, like, after when he's, like, a year old, I begin to it begins to hurt in my nipples. When I breastfeed him and my when I sleep on the side, my hips begin to, like, be in pain when I wake up. I'm like, fuck. That hurts. And, you know, I just I think all of this is because, I'm nursing and I'm just, you know, taking care of my own child. I'm not working. I'm, like, you know, just have my child with me all the time. And then, you know, I even climb a mountain carrying my baby on the back. And then I I I come home from a from a travel, to Ireland, I remember. And and I've just been wrapped up in, like, sweaters and a lot of clothes because it's been so cold there. And I come home, I look myself in in the mirror, and I'm like, me, that's a pregnant belly.
Speaker 1
Oh my god.
Speaker 3
And I'm like, okay. I could I could be just, like, newly pregnant, or I could be pregnant for maybe four months. And so the belly looks like a four months pregnancy, which is so crazy because, you know, I'm a yoga teacher. I'm a body therapist. And I I should be very, you know, aware. I feel somehow, but, I was just living life and being with my baby and not really Right. I was contributing all the these things to Mhmm. Kelly.
Speaker 1
Yeah. Well and when it's not even on your radar, it can definitely be easy to miss until it's not.
Speaker 3
Yeah. Yeah. And so, you know, I I I had an unassisted, birth for at least or pregnancy for at least four months. Yeah. So I'm pregnant, find find out in in March. And so we were gonna have a baby five months after. So that was, like, the wildest, emotional journey because we had just, you know, gone and come on top of, of the the first year, which was not that hard. But I I I find my child to be mild and easy, but with still, like, not a lot of sleep and la la la. You still have a baby. Exactly. Exactly. And and, yeah. Yeah. So we both have to, you know, come to terms with this, but it's also just so ironic, so so hilarious that I'm four months pregnant. I'm like, I never thought I would be that woman. You know? Wow. So but, you know, from the beginning, from the moment I find out, I'm just like, thank you, god. Just feels so right. Yeah. And I do my thing, and, I I, I then find out that it's possible to birth on your own. So it's like, I am gonna free birth this baby. A friend sends me a podcast from Free Birth Society. Oh, hey. Oh. And so I listened to, is it Alexandra? I listened to her story, the woman who gives birth in a yurt far out in the wilderness. And it just you know, it took that one story to for me to realize that, wow, this is possible. If other women can do this, of course, I can do this. And and it just first, I thought I wanted her there or another one. But then I could just feel, wow. My birth is gonna be taken away from me somehow. And that is my biggest fear. That is why I don't give birth at hospitals because that's my greatest fear that they're gonna destroy my birth and not let me birth. And so now I'm, like, thinking should I should I have, like, a private midwife or a midwife from the hospital? And then it dawns upon me that, wow, I don't need a midwife. I don't need someone to tell me what to do and how to birth my baby. And so, my partner is very supportive of me from the very beginning. Of course, he's like, wouldn't it be good to have a midwife? But, you know, I I convinced him. But he was also just like, if this is what's important for you, if this is what you need to feel safe, I support you. And what what happens then? Yeah. I I so I tell my old midwife that I just need to to move in another direction. And and I at that moment, I just feel like, oh, wow. Like, it's it's all, like, going inwards. I'm taking it all back. Taking all my power back, and I'm, like, so excited. Unfortunately, looking back at it, I didn't have, like, a free pregnancy, which I hope now. If if I now having two babies under two, I'm like, I don't need to get pregnant again. But who knows? If ever again, I definitely wanna have also an unassisted free pregnancy because I did go to the midwives at the hospital, and there was this doctor who told me I didn't even know I was meeting with him. He was like, you had a three degree, third degree rupture, so you have to give birth at the hospital. And I was like, I wanna give birth at home. So that he was like, we are professionals in holding on the perineum when you give birth. You have to lie on your back, blah blah blah. And so we recommend you give birth at the hospital. And I was like, I
Speaker 1
am not gonna do that. No shit. They recommend you birth at the hospital. It's like it's like walking into Pizza Hut and then being like, recommend you have Pizza Hut.
Speaker 3
You have Pizza Hut. Yes. Mhmm. Yeah. Yeah. I was just such an old man. You know? And and so okay. My baby then happens to be breech. My second baby. He's a little breech baby. And and, you know, I didn't I didn't know that was, like, a bad a bad thing, air quote. But in the hospital world, it's it's a risk high risk birth.
Speaker 1
So your your plan so your plan, just so that I'm clear, your plan was I'm going to engage in the system for my pregnancy and then just stay home in birth.
Speaker 3
Yep.
Speaker 1
And then that was further you double downed on that even more when with the breach situation.
Speaker 3
You know, when then I found out that it was breach, then, of course, they put a lot of fear inside my mind, telling me all of these myths and also telling me about the procedures of how I would give birth at the hospital. And I was just like, no. I cannot I cannot do this. And so it was actually when my baby was breeched, then I was definitely sure I you know, there was no other option. I have to give birth at home, and I have to do it without any authorities there. Also, private midwives are not allowed, to, assist the breech birth at home.
Speaker 1
Right.
Speaker 3
And, you know, I was journeying between fear and trust, fear and trust, and really going on an on an inner inner journey. But the fear also guided me to make the choice of birthing alone and and birthing at home. Because I I was told that at the hospital, I would need to get monitored and listened to every fifteen minute, and I would need to be cut open probably. And, like it's, like, fifty percent of of old breaches end up in c section. And I just I couldn't, you know, I couldn't follow
Speaker 1
follow that path. In Denmark, they're supportive potentially of a trial of labor.
Speaker 3
At one hospital, they are. Okay. At one hospital. And, actually, the doctor who wanted me to give birth at the hospital happens to be the one who allows women at his hospital to give breed or at least to try to, like, birth a breach.
Speaker 1
It's so fucking condescending. It's just so condescending. Yeah. Like, we are just not allowed to make our own decisions. It's crazy.
Speaker 3
Yeah. And they wanted me to come to, to to checkups every week. And so at the end, I, you know, I contact you. I talk to you. And, and I I actually I opt out of all the meetings there. They keep calling me in, but I'm just like, no. Thanks. And so, you know, I begin to create this birth field at home in, in my apartment in our apartment. And I, you know, just I begin to really talk to my baby because I was also told that this baby really needs to get turnt. And so for for some weeks, I really stressed out, you know, doing all the spinning babies and rebozos and la la la to get this baby churned. But then and they also wanted me to do an easy v, which was just, like, felt so wrong. I couldn't do that. And the reason I couldn't was that I spoke with my baby spirit, and he just, you know, he told me that, mom, everything will be alright. Everything will be alright. I want to be birthed this way. And, so I it I just I I trusted so deeply, like, for the first time in my life. That teaching of trusting the universe, really trusting, just leaning into the flow of life. That was the first time I really, really, really felt felt that. Yeah. And That's awesome. Yeah. You know, I created the possibility of giving giving birth to a breech at home, and it's just so felt so good to, to just be guided by my baby and by my womb wisdom who knew that nothing was wrong. Everything was supposed to go this way. Yeah. So we stopped telling anyone that it was a breach, actually, because they kept asking, so has he turned now? And and and we decide we we just, told people that everything is the way it's supposed to be. So, I have a feeling on the tenth of August that, this is the day. And so I get, a doula friend to come over, to give me a massage, and I I send my toddler to my mom and and dad, and pack his bag for, like, sleeping there and sleeping out for the first time. So that was huge, but I feel very safe having him there. And, yeah, so I'm totally relaxed. And, also, I am, you know, meditating, and still a little bit concerned with the what ifs. Like, what if? You know? But then I I get the insight on that day, the realization that I feel Elo, my baby, is asking me to take full responsibility for his life and his death. And then I started crying. And I was like, little dear baby soul, I can do that. I'm taking full responsibility, and I trust that everything will go the way it's supposed to go. And then I get the massage, and I'm just, like, so relaxed. And then I go sit myself in the ocean. It's, like, three thirty. And then I go home and I lie lie on the couch. Then I start to feel something, but I'm like, I'm not sure this is not sure this is labor. We were supposed to go out and and get a teller at my parents. But we just called my parents and, like, we're gonna we're just gonna wait and see. So I'm lying there and feeling a little bit, feeling a little bit more. And then, like, around five, I know, okay. This is most likely labor. And so I call my friend, who is gonna just come and be with me. And I tell her, I think birth is I think it's birth, but I'm not buying it yet. I remember saying that. And then, you know, I walk a little bit around and I, you know, sit with my alter. And my my partner is, like, massaging me. And it's very it's very calm and just, you know, natural. And then around six, I'm like, you have to call my friend now because now it now it's happening. It wasn't until then that I was completely sure, which is weird because I was definitely having searches. And then she comes, and, yeah, before she enters, she tells me afterwards, you know, she just, like, called upon the angels and sanctified the the space. And she just came in and she was so meditative and and just supporting me. And I was listening to, like, an audio that I had listened to during birth. And, just like that. And and things were, like, starting to, warm up. And and then I, remember just wanting to be at the toilet. Like, I just wanted to empty myself so so much. And so I just sat out there, forgot all about my altar and my space in there, and, was just leaning over a chair. And, and I was just doing, you know, I was just doing it myself. I was very aware the whole time. I was not zoning out like I was the first time because this time I knew I had all the responsibility. I promised my baby to take full responsibility. But I was definitely in the zone. And they were not intervening or asking questions. They were just supporting me and my was leaning against my partner in in in the searches when they got more intense. And he was using sound healing, and I was using a lot of sound. He, yeah, he sound healed my, my womb and my lower back. And, I start to lie over this huge pilates fall. And, I just I just I just remember this energy of, like, opening and and completely letting go. Like, I had really practiced to let go and not resist for many years, actually. So this was the this was where it all went down of completely letting go. And I was scanning down through my body, like, am I holding back, anywhere? Then I'm like, okay. This is it's only been I I didn't know it had been three hours at the time or two and a half, but I, I just felt that I just went into labor. So there's probably, like, a good while yet because my first birth was thirty hours. And so I try I get my friend to try to blow up the water pool because I'm like, I need to get into the water. And then I just start dripping blood. And she's like, your baby is coming now. And, then I I move over to lie over the couch. And, you know, I have these orgastic searches. And and I I remember, you know, it was my my my mind somehow that transformed it because, I had been told by a friend who also had orgastic labor that, like, this could either be really painful or really pleasurable. And so I just, you know, created the possibility of pleasure. And and it was like a complete letting go. And you if you're playing the the sound clip, you will that's one of the orgasic searches. And it's not the entire search that that is, like, pleasurable, but it's definitely the end. And it's just like this, oh, a wonderful opening and letting go. And I'm on all four moving over to the couch now. Giving birth on a yoga mat that my, friend who had died, like, a half a year, before, like, had rolled out for us. That's another story. But, anyway, I gave birth on her yoga mat, which was felt very, very sacred as well. Yeah. And then, my partner is behind me and, you know, the the the blood starts to come out just like little beautiful drops there. And then these other searches just begin to rush through my body. And I remember everything just becoming so silent and I becoming so focused because, you know, I knew that, okay, this is a breach. The head needs to come up. But it's it's not like I was in my mind, but I just I knew, but I completely trusted. I trust my baby and my partner. He, I remember him saying just, like, follow the baby's flow. Just, like, listen listen to him. Just follow the baby's flow. And I just remember opening, like, my legs so much, like, sliding my knees out to the side, and then one push comes. So I'm not pushing. I'm just breathing through it. And so the the baby butt comes out, and, and then his one leg. And and I'm asking at that moment because, you know, it's either a footling or, like, a frank breech. And, I wanted the butt to come out first. And so I asked, so what is out? And my partner is like, the penis, which was so much fun at that moment. It was like, okay. But and then but then I I, you know, and then I touched down, and I felt his butt, and I felt his leg, and I just caressed him. And then another, like, push comes over me, and the next leg is out. And it's so easy. And for the next one, within a few seconds, the arms are out. And within another few seconds, it's like mouth and nose comes out. But before that, I remember just being like, when the arms are out, I'm so everything everything is still. Just remember that, energy moment so it's so profound. And I'm, like, just completely opening and just really waiting for that search to come because I wanted the head to come out. And it just yeah. He just he comes out, and he takes his first breath while hanging there. And then before we know it, he's all out, and I get him on my chest. And, you know, I get that healing moment that I didn't have in my first birth. So that trauma really pushed me into, my power into this birth. And, he's, like, crying within thirty seconds. He's all blue, but within, again, a few seconds as I remember it. I don't even remember the time, but very fast, he's, like, he's red. And he's a little rusty. Like, I can I feel there's something in in his throat? And so I just suck it out a few times. And I rub him. And I also remember something that was just stuck with me from our conversation when when I had the session with you, Emily, that I just remember you saying, you will know. Like, you will know what to do. And it was so true. I I I knew what to do. And I didn't I didn't need to do much. I probably overdid a little bit just, you know, to make sure. But yeah, it's so beautiful. Like my, my partner he's crying and we're kissing and we're kissing the baby. I'm not crying at all. I'm like, why am I not crying afterwards? I was thinking that, but, you know, I, I think I had just been so present and so aware, and I knew that I couldn't stone out. Exactly. Yeah. And, so my friend, she gives me this amazing herb within five minutes called, motherwort mother ward tincture that she had made. And so my placenta delivery happens five minutes after. It's I just, like, feel the surge and, like, squat and it's out. And I don't know if that was it, but it's set to help and to mother the mother. Yeah. And then we keep we keep the the cord on for many hours. We just everything is just so beautiful and still, and I just remember being so restful, so peaceful, and and really, you know, I feel so proud of myself just talking about it now. I can feel the whole, like, giggling sensation.
Speaker 1
Yeah. I mean, it's pure magic.
Speaker 3
It's pure magic. And both of us just came out of this experience with like our arms over the head. We were just like on top of the world. Completely healed. And, yeah, you know, we just consulted our inner guidance the whole time and and not the the outer Mhmm. Guidance that we are taught throughout life to trust more. So that was really, really a powerful teaching. Yeah. Beautiful.
Speaker 1
Go, girl.
Speaker 3
Yeah. So beautiful. Oh.
Speaker 1
So I know that, unfortunately, there is another chapter. Mhmm. Although, I guess, it does have a good ending.
Speaker 3
It does have a good ending.
Speaker 1
So tell us tell us that
Speaker 3
Okay. Annoying final chapter. So annoying. So we don't we don't even think about calling the hospital that night. It only took three hours to give birth. And so, you know, we were just in that field. And so we called the day my partner calls the day after. And
Speaker 1
And tell us why you called?
Speaker 3
That's something you have to. It's illegal to not tell that a baby is born in Denmark. But we didn't know how important it was. So when we called, just to let them know, and to get the CPR number, like Social Security, blah blah blah. They were like, what? Was there no authority? We need they were like, we need a DNA test, to make sure I don't know. But to make sure that this was our baby, and Martin was like, but we have, photos of this baby coming out of her vagina. Is that not, like, proof enough? No. You we need some some someone with authorization, which is just so ridiculous. And they were like, what if something had happened and you didn't have a security number? What would have happened to him and la la la. Just, you know, creating so much fear and so much tension.
Speaker 1
Because just for the listeners Yeah. You were transparent as I understand it. Please correct me if I'm wrong. Mhmm. You were transparent with them that you intentionally stayed home to have your breech baby. Right?
Speaker 3
Yes.
Speaker 1
As I remember it, there was quite a lot of Yeah. Medical provider people being all up in your business wanting you to come in, like you said, calling you asking where you were. And then you were honest with them that you purposely purposely
Speaker 3
Yeah.
Speaker 1
Stayed home, had your baby breech, and then called a registered baby.
Speaker 3
But I wasn't necessarily so transparent about it being a free birth unassisted because I was afraid of telling them I didn't know what they were gonna do And they probably would have reported us because that's what they did after. Right. It's
Speaker 1
like you got reported anyway.
Speaker 3
I got reported to social services and they were like, these people put all sanity aside and they risked the the life of their unborn baby. And we are worried if they can take care, being so, like, stupid, or insane, being so insane, if they can take care of their baby. They might need support from the system. Wow. Yeah. Which and, you know, that was just yeah. Little bit stressful for sure. And not helping the the new mother and Oh, that's so scary. Breastfeeding along. Yeah. But So a case gets
Speaker 1
opened against you pretty early, like, day one or two postpartum, where you're literally being threatened that your child or children could be taken from you having just birthed in in sovereignty.
Speaker 3
I mean, they didn't say that, but that would definitely I mean, if if they worry if you can't take care of your baby, that's definitely the, like, the worst case scenario. Right? So, yeah, basic we were talking about, like, will they come and knock on our door and take our baby away? We were not gonna let them. But, but, yeah, that was basically it. And so we had to go to, to a meeting with a so, like like, what is it called? Like, a social caregiver. And so we suit like, my partner really suited up, and I wore, like, my most goddess y dress, colorful and, you know, just, like, owning it. And what was really amazing was that the people there at that center, they were completely on our side. It was still ridiculous that we had to go there and tell the story and prove that we were good parents for sure. But they were like, this is the first time we have received a report because parents didn't, like, or because they had another belief system. They had not experienced that before. So we were pretty proud about that.
Speaker 1
Thank god. It always stories like this always make me think about wanting to start a legal organized
Speaker 3
Yeah. Religion Yes.
Speaker 1
That everybody who free verse can just say that they're a part of this religion because there is so much religious freedom obviously in the
Speaker 3
world. Mhmm. Then we could all just be like, no. No. We're just, I I
Speaker 1
don't have a
Speaker 3
good leavers. Yeah. Yeah. No. We'll find one. Yeah.
Speaker 1
So so, basically, a couple weeks of stress and and Yeah. Whatever, fear mongering. But then you go to the meeting, and they're like, oh, you're obviously totally wonderful.
Speaker 3
Same thing. They closed it they closed the case immediately, but but the hospital staff, you know, I could I could read in my file. Like, a few days ago, I read my file, and it said that they were thinking about reporting me and Martin on behalf of Elo, on behalf of our baby to the, like, council of patient safety because we were risking his life. So they were kind of they were, yeah, they were thinking about I don't know if it's suing us, but definitely reporting us on behalf of Elo, which is just like, you can't even do that. It doesn't you can't even do that, and it doesn't make sense. But, like, we were To get pregnant is to risk a life.
Speaker 1
You know what I mean? Like, it it is risky business for us to walking around being these channels and instruments of life and death. Like, it is inherently risk to even get pregnant and to give birth.
Speaker 3
You know, because we are children
Speaker 1
of life and death. And so this Yeah.
Speaker 3
Onset that so inherently natural and safe and beautiful and loving. Right.
Speaker 1
And what is even safe? You know? Yeah.
Speaker 3
Like Yeah.
Speaker 1
You know, women birth, stillborns also and I don't know if I would even call that a bad outcome or unsafe, you know?
Speaker 3
Like Mhmm.
Speaker 1
This is a part of being animals and being and being alive and and being women and being mothers and Yeah. It's only the narrative that I mean, obviously, we all want
Speaker 3
to Yeah. No. No. Yes.
Speaker 1
Without freaking saying and that doesn't always happen and it doesn't happen, you know, I'm a broken record, but it doesn't happen in all settings. And so that you chose the safest environment for you to be the instrument, you know, of life. Yeah. Just like I did. Just like, you know, all women do. All the
Speaker 3
women do.
Speaker 1
Really are doing their best to find
Speaker 3
Yeah.
Speaker 1
The right environment for what they believe to be the safest. It's just that we're not supported to do it, in in Turkey and in this deep, deep, deep, deep, deep anti mothers, you know, world.
Speaker 3
And why is it more okay for a baby to die at the hospital than in the arms of a loving mother? Right? But you could get in jail for that, I found out. Yeah. And so many people afterwards
Speaker 1
Well, it's an incredible it's an incredible control mechanism.
Speaker 3
Yeah. You
Speaker 1
know, with the narrative Yeah.
Speaker 3
For sure.
Speaker 1
That no one no baby is allowed to die outside the hospital creates a level of following the rules. Yeah. Because women are penalized and criminalized and Yeah. Ostracized if they experience, if they experience, you know, that outcome at home,
Speaker 3
you
Speaker 1
know, if they do anything against the grain against, you know, patriarchy and and industrial birth, it's really
Speaker 3
You know what I felt was that in my pregnancy, they were trying to reach their big fat arms into my womb and turn my baby. Like, they were trying to control everything from the inside out, and and owning my baby more than me, owning my body more than me, which is just yeah. We need to it's a paradigm shift, and that's why they're shaking. That's why they reported us because, the wild woman doesn't serve the industrialized, hospitalized,
Speaker 1
mechanisms. The the moment that the majority of women opt out of this system that harms and oppresses us, you know, like, the moment that, like, you did and like I did and like so many women, every woman on this podcast, you know, when Mhmm. Majority of women opt out and go, fuck that system, that
Speaker 3
doesn't support
Speaker 1
us, that doesn't have
Speaker 3
our best
Speaker 1
interest in well, then everything changes. And so family to family, woman to woman, it is changing, you know, because it's not changing globally, but it changed for you. And it changed for me. And that Yeah. Oh, it's changed for every voice that's
Speaker 3
ever been on this podcast. Yeah. That is a shift. Yeah. And it will have such a huge effect on our babies' lives and their mission in the world that they have come out this way. Exactly. So beautiful. I've met two kinds of people after giving birth. Like, one kind being, you were so lucky nothing went wrong. And and the other the other group of people just being, you know, so supportive. My dad was so proud. I did I did it like this. Like, he's, like, telling the whole world. And and it's so wonderful to just rest in the knowing that, well, this is why my baby was born so safe. Oh, and now he's crying. Aww, it's okay. He's here.
Speaker 1
He meets me. It's okay. Thank you so much for your time. This was such a beautiful story. Hi, Penn.
Speaker 3
Yeah, thank you. Thank you, a We got babies coming in. We're ending our coming. Hi, baby. That's it for today, everyone.
Speaker 1
Join us next week for another episode of the FreeBirth podcast. Thanks for joining us, and remember, your body, your choice. Lots of love.
